Christina and I had our 2nd class last Sunday and boy was it a shocker. I have be warned by my friends that you will eventually watch a video on childbirth and you will see everything.
I was preparing myself for this time and hoping it would come much later, but little did we know that they decided to play us a portion of the video in this class.
We first watched a video on how to massage your pregnant wife. Let me tell you something, it was a straight porn video basically except no nudity. It was made in the early 70's, probably around the time that our youth pastor, Charlie Brown, was working at Giant. The video had the cheesy music and the two people that were in it, seemed awfully comfortable with each other. Christina and I just laughed most of the time, so it was hard for her to relax while watching it, bc she saw the faces I was making.
The next part about made me as with what Iron Maiden sang, "RUN TO THE HILLS". Our instructor is all about midwives and having the baby at home, since she did with her 2nd one. The 2nd video we saw was of women about to give birth walking around their room at the midwife clinic place practically buck-naked. At least some of the women wore a tee-shirt, but they must of forgot to put on their pants and undergarments for the video. A weird thing in the video I remember was one lady wanted to have her daughter in the room to watch her give birth to her soon-to-be brother. While the prego lady was walking around the room (let me remind you walking around naked) trying to speed up the delivery, her daughter would try and look up her mom's skirt to see if the baby was coming out, but remember the lady was not wearing any clothes.
We then saw another lady have her baby in a bath tub. You saw the head come out, she petted the babies head, then the rest just slid right down the water slide.
Our instructor was nice enough to edit out most of the labors, but she said will be see much more soon. Let me tell you I can't wait, I am going to bring popcorn next time, and a bag to puke in.
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3 comments:
wassa matta joe? got no jokes anymore? no more "caleb, you are such a girl for going to that class" comments? watching that baby come out makes you feel a bit "inadequate"?
you have experienced true enlightenment grasshopper.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAH!
You need to go back to my earlier posts and read about our first experiences with the class. I think we saw the video with the little girl in the room. SICK!
HEHEHEHHEHEHEHHEHE!!! Just remember I did NOT tell you to take the class. You made your own decision. HEHEHEHHEHEHEH!
Popcorn & Puke should not be used in the same sentence.
Thank you... drive through.
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